A reflection on booze (Not written my me or Becky)

  1. "I feel sorry for people who don't drink. When they wake up in the morning, that's as good as they're going to feel all day."
  2. "The problem with some people is that when they aren't drunk, they're sober."
  3. "Time is never wasted when you're wasted all the time".
  4. "Reality is an illusion that occurs due to lack of alcohol."
  5. "A woman drove me to drink and I didn't even have the decency to thank her."
  6. "What contemptible scoundrel has stolen the cork to my lunch?"
  7. "When I read about the evils of drinking, I gave up reading."
  8. "Life is a waste of time, time is a waste of life, so get wasted all of the time and have the time of your life."
  9. "I'd rather have a bottle in front of me, than a frontal lobotomy."
  10. "24 hours in a day, 24 beers in a case. Coincidence?"
  11. "You can't be a real country unless you have a beer and an airline. It helps if you have some kind of a football team, or some nuclear weapons, but at the very least you need a beer."
  12. "Always remember that I have taken more out of alcohol than alcohol has taken out of me."
  13. "Beer is proof that God loves us and wants us to be happy."
  14. "If you ever reach total enlightenment while drinking beer, I bet it makes beer shoot out your nose."
  15. "Without question, the greatest invention in the history of mankind is beer. Oh, I grant you that the wheel was also a fine invention, but the wheel does not go nearly as well with pizza."
  16. "The problem with the world is that everyone is a few drinks behind."
  17. "Give me a woman who loves beer and I will conquer the world."
  18. "You're not drunk if you can lie on the floor without holding on."
  19. "You know you're drunk when you fall off the floor."
  20. And God said, "Let there be vodka!" And He saw that it was good. Then God said, "Let there be light!" And then He said, "Whoa - too much light."
  21. "To some its a six-pack, to me it's a support Group"
  22. "If I had all the money ive spent on booze........ I'll spend it on booze"

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