Bumpersticker Bonanza

  1. Boldly Going Nowhere
  2. Car service: If it ain't broke, we'll break it.
  3. Cover me I'm changing lanes
  4. Forget world peace. Visualize using your turn signal.
  5. Friends don't let Friends drive Naked.
  6. Hang up and drive.
  7. He who hesitates is not only lost but miles from the next exit
  8. Honk if you love peace and quiet.
  9. Honk if anything falls off
  10. Honk if you're ontologically alienated
  11. How can I get in your way when you don't even have one?
  12. I brake for no apparent reason
  13. I don't brake.
  14. I drive way too fast to worry about cholesterol.
  15. If you can read this, I can slam on my brakes and sue you!
  16. If you can read this, please flip me back over... (seen upside down, on a Jeep)
  17. If you lived in your car, you'd be home by now
  18. I'm out of bed and dressed, what more do you want?
  19. My Hockey Mom Can Beat Up Your Soccer Mom
  20. My other car has bumperstickers, too
  21. Question Appearances
  22. Question Authority
  23. Question Reality
  24. Remember folks: Stop lights timed for 35mph are also timed for 70mph.
  25. Seen on the back of a biker's vest: If you can read this, my wife fell off.
  26. So many pedestrians so little time
  27. Subvert the Dominant Paradigm
  28. This bumpersticker exploits illiterates
  29. This is it, I don't have another car.
  30. This is Not an Abandoned Vehicle - on an old, rusted-out car with 2 plastic bags taped over where the rear windows used to be, parked in a shopping center.
  31. Today's Mood: Irritable
  32. Warning! I brake for hallucinations
  33. Warning: Dates in Calendar are closer than they appear.
  34. WARNING! Driver only carries $20.00 in ammunition
  35. Welcome to California. Now Go Home.
  36. When everything's coming your way, you're in the wrong lane and going the wrong way.
  37. You're slower than a herd of turtles stampeding through peanut butter.
  38. If you can read this, I can slam on my brakes and sue you!
  39. Jesus loves you, but everyone else thinks you're an asshole.
  40. 100,000 sperm and YOU were the fastest?
  41. Your gene pool needs a little chlorine.
  42. JESUS SAVES . . . They Pass It To Lemieux . . .He Shoots..He..Scores!
  43. You are depriving some poor village of its IDIOT.
  44. Save Your Breath ... You'll need it to blow up your date!
  45. Forget world peace. Visualize using your turn signal.
  46. My Hockey Mom Can Beat Up Your Soccer Mom.
  47. GROW YOUR OWN DOPE, PLANT A MAN.
  48. I used to have a handle on life, but it broke.
  49. WANTED: Meaningful overnight relationship.
  50. BEER: It's not just for breakfast anymore.
  51. So you're a feminist...Isn't that cute.
  52. Beauty is in the eye of the beer holder.
  53. The more you complain, the longer God makes you live.
  54. IRS: We've got what it takes to take what you've got.
  55. >Hard work has a future payoff. Laziness pays off now.
  56. Reality is a crutch for people who can't handle drugs.
  57. Out of my mind...Back in five minutes.
  58. I took an IQ test and the results were negative.
  59. Where there's a will...I want to be on it.
  60. Friends help you move. Real friends help you move bodies.
  61. Consciousness: That annoying time between naps.
  62. Ever stop to think, and forget to start again?
  63. Be nice to your kids...They will pick out your nursing home.
  64. Always remember you're unique...Just like everyone else.
  65. Honk If You Want To See My Finger.
  66. Who lit the fuse on your tampon?
  67. Support Cannibalism — EAT ME!
  68. God is my co-pilot, but the Devil is my bombardier.
  69. I don't have a license to kill. I have a learner's permit.
  70. I wasn't born a bitch. Men like you made me this way.
  71. Keep honking while I reload.
  72. Taxation WITH representation isn't so hot, either!
  73. Who were the beta testers for Preparations A through G?
  74. Madness takes its toll. Please have exact change.
  75. 5 days a week my body is a temple. The other two, it's an amusement park.
  76. EARTH FIRST! We'll stripmine the other planets later.
  77. Your child may be an honor student but you're still an idiot.
  78. If you drink, don't park. Accidents cause people.
  79. If you can read this, I can hit my brakes and sue you.
  80. Save the whales! Trade them for valuable prizes.
  81. Whitewater is over when the First Lady sings.
  82. Jack Kevorkian for White House physician.
  83. Just say no! to sex with pro-lifers.
  84. My wife keeps complaining I never listen to her...or something like that.
  85. Sure you can trust the government! Just ask an Indian!
  86. Alcohol and calculus don't mix. Never drink and derive.
  87. If we are what we eat; I'm cheap, fast, and easy.
  88. Stop repeat offenders. Don't re-elect them!

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